Tuesday, October 5, 2010


[I feel that I'm taking a bit of a risk by being painstakingly honest in the below post. Please don't take it personally and try really hard to remember that everyone has struggles...right? Anyone?]
The last couple days were hard on my personality. Where I wanted clarity I was given confusion. When I wanted structure I was forced to improvise. I had to settle for less than ideal. I was late. I was blamed. I was too concerned when I should have just let things go.
In reflection I know I could have handled said 'things' a lot better. I should have been gracious instead of incredulous...but I wasn't. I could have taken the blame and embraced humility...but I didn't.
The more time I spend with these new people the more I learn about myself. I used to think that I could never be annoyed...not true. I once believed that I couldn't believe anything negative about a person...false.
I'm a little excited about this discovery.
I often question if I have adequate critical thinking skills. I mean, if I always go with the flow and am 'ok' with anything and everything...well, should I be nervous?
Over the years I have learned that while embracing a humble attitude and an open mind is generally a positive thing, lines must be drawn and choices must be made. I have very little desire to live my life floating along like an aimless, although beautiful, leaf drifting along in the stream of life. I want to be able to claim my thoughts and ideas with reverence. So take that all you people who once said, "but brit, you like everybody"; let it be known though...I do like everybody:)
Additionally, from looking at my reactions to the people around me, I have realized just how opinionated and strong willed I really am. This realization has been interesting. I'm not sure why it has taken me so long to become aware this fault...probably because my roommate(s) was (were) incredibly accommodating. But now I know what most of you have probably known for quite some time.
So thank you everyone for not only tolerating my craziness, but also loving me through it.
p.s. I encourage you all to check out 'Vampire Weekend'...in my opinion, they're fantastic.

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